Name: Alykanas Beach Grand Hotel by Zante Plaza
Price range: from £526.97pp (7 nights includes flights and transfers)

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Our 4th Visit to Alykanas Grand Beach Hotel... and Definitely Our Last!

Oh, Alykanas Grand, how you’ve *fallen*. What once felt like a slice of paradise now feels like a sitcom where we’re the unwilling main characters.

Let’s start with the “buffet” – food’s laid out bright and early, so the *flies* can have first dibs. Yes, the same flies that come in from the questionable “brown messes” dotting the grounds. *Yum.* The result? Over 30 guests we knew, including my wife, taking up a new hobby: sprinting to the restroom.

And about that beach we looked forward to? It now resembles a post-apocalyptic film set. Picture sandbags as “support beams,” weeds as décor, and those stunning sun terraces we loved... totally closed. Apparently, the website *forgot* to mention this, but why spoil the surprise, right?

As for the “amenities,” if you’re into sewage aromas and light-bulb-testing via wet-finger methods by cigarette-toting handymen – you’re in luck!

We tried reaching out to the hotel and TUI for some sympathy, but they seemed to have the same “meh” attitude the place itself has adopted. The real horror stories are over on Facebook. You can join us there – it’s a real support group at this point.

From Paradise to Purgatory: My Stay at the Hotel of Broken Dreams.

I stayed at this hotel in October with my two teenage sons. My first trip abroad in 10 years and I was only able to afford it having been bereaved of my mother earlier in the year and left a small amount of money, so needless to say I did lots of research before deciding where to go. We were not disappointed, the hotel was everything I wanted it to be. Our rooms (we had an interconnecting suite on the first floor) were spotlessly clean and comfortable. The bathroom is a wet-room but the shower drained quickly and it was quite possible to keep most of the floor dry with common sense about how long a shower to have, and how to angle the shower head.

The setting is stunning, beautiful beach, safe, shallow a long way out, crystal clear blue water, no more than a minute’s walk from our room, with a view of green mountains to one side, and Kefalonia to the other. The village is friendly with a good selection of bars, tavernas and shops in easy walking distance.

Lots of sun loungers to choose from and I’m pleased to share that I encountered none that were broken, dirty or uncomfortable. I enjoyed the music being played at the pool bar. If you want to sunbathe directly on the beach, the sand is comfortable to lie on, and there is a beach bar a little way along that charges 5 euros per sun bed and then leaves you alone, no hassle to buy food and drinks although we did eat here a couple of times and the food was good.

My boys were able to go jet-skiing from the beach, reasonable hire price and I was impressed with the approach to safety of the people we hired them from.

My favourite thing about the hotel, was the all inclusive buffet. Lots of choice at breakfast; full English if that’s the way you roll, my boys ate it every day, big selection of things to drizzle, spread or sprinkle onto yoghurt, toast, and pancakes. Cereals and also cheeses,  hams  and vegetables.

Lunch and dinner, big selection of salad vegetables, and cooked vegetable dishes, traditional Greek meat stews, grilled meets and chips, etc. I was pleased I got to try some Greek dishes I haven’t had before, including Zakynthan rabbit stew, loukoumades  and spoon-sweets.

Everything was clean and most guests were exercising common sense about how to circulate around the buffet and respect buffet etiquette and hygiene.

To sum up, if you want to visit a fantasy-theme park version of Greece, where you get to sit in the hot sun, eating porridge and looking at emerald-green grass, and don’t have to encounter Greek cooking styles, shower fittings or insects, go somewhere else. And if you want to go somewhere where most guests are English, you will find that elsewhere in Zakynthos. But, if you want a holiday where you actually feel like you are in Greece, you will find a safe, comfortable, and authentic experience here.

Lovely stay

DO NOT BOOK THIS HOTEL.

This hotel was terrible. And it really saddens me to say it but it was terrible.

I read the reviews before going and thought, it's quite a mix of good and bad so we would make our own minds up when we got there.

The children's club - everything was boxed up and the lady didn't speak to us. We then found out from other guests that it was her last day and she was leaving. So that was shut the full week. It was in a hut and the floor was caving in.
The park was falling apart. 4 children were on this and it looked like it was going to snap.
The big umbrella was broken which was over the slide and swings.

The food was okay. A lot of effort goes into buffet food but nothing was hot and again flies were everywhere. 
If you have children then they probably won't eat properly all week. As the kids option was chips and veg every day with a few fish fingers thrown in every other days.
My daughter lived off pancakes for breakfast,  chips for dinner and chips for tea with an icecream inbetween.

The pool was lovely.
But the children's pool was absolutely filthy. The slides were rusty and not secure. It was also very very slippy! So dangerous.

Hotel has eroded into the sea. Nowhere said this. Not on any online platforms, just reviews. I didn't think too much of this becayse its nobodys fault but until you see it it's so bad. Nothing up apart from black and yellow tape. So dangerous.

Plenty of sunbeds, nobody fought for any but they were practically like sitting on the floor. I struggled to get up off of them.

They encouraged lucky lucky men to come in and walk around whilst sat by the pool. I don't agree with this but we were polite every time.

Drinks. Now I'm not fussy. But the drinks were so bad.
Cocktails were syrups.
No fresh orange and apple juice. This came from a machine and was dilute pop. Fresh drinking water came from the same machine but it kept breaking, so many days this was unavailable. We ended up going to the local supermarket and getting pop and bottles of water and crisps.
Fizzy pop was flat every time, as was the beer (on tap that you pulled yourself)
Wine on tap was like drinking acid.
Don't get me started on the coffee machines.

Could not fault the staff, they worked so hard and nothing was too much to ask for food wise
 (apart from the lifeguard but he was one on his own, what a horrible man)

Then we get to the room. 😞
No lift so we had to walk up 4 flights of stairs. To get to our room, put the key in the hole and within about 10 seconds all the electric turned off. Must have been faulty because even after she said maintenance had been, it still did it.
Air con didn't work. Then when it did, it only switched on when both outside doors and sliding doors were shut and locked but this blacked out the whole room.
€20 FOR USE OF THE SAFE!!
The room door, the only way I can explain it is a front door of a house. Bizarre I know. But this also had no lock on the inside which meant my 4 year old could open it at any time day or night. Luckily my daughter is amazing and knows right from wrong.
Shower leaked all into the bathroom.

This hotel is basically in the middle of nowhere. Yes it has a little town with a few restaurants and a few tacky shops but apart from that their is nothing.
It cost us €30 to zante in a taxi and €30 back. As theirs only 3 buses a day! 

I wouldn't say it was rubbish, because it is what you make it. My daughter had the best time. And family time is what I life for. But this hotel needs a full re do. It's no where near 4 stars. I'd say pushing a 2 and that's been kind.

Please don't be fooled by the photos of this and how beautiful it looks because it's on the beach front.

I have emailed jet 2 but yet to have a response.

AVOID AVOID AVOID

The staff were amazing. All very friendly and eager to help. My family and I had a great time and will treasure the memories from this holiday. The only downside for us would be the quality of food. Although they worked hard to meet the general population's tastebuds. For us, it lacked flavour.

Friendly staff

We stayed at the Alykanas Grand Beach Hotel end of September 2024.  I think it bills itself as either a 4 or 5 star hotel. By UK standards and many other worldwide standards, it really isn’t that. As a holiday resort hotel I’d probably place it at a high 2 or low 3 star. 
First of all, the plus points.
We had a ‘superior apartment’. This consisted of 2 generous sized bedrooms. One room had bunk beds and a single. The other was a double.  All the beds were very comfortable and the bedding appeared clean. Each room had very efficient air conditioning and each room had Samsung smart tv’s. In the double room there was a kettle, some sachets of instant coffee, sugar and teabags but no milk. Cups and glasses were also provided as was a small fridge with a small freezer compartment. The double room had a patio sliding door with access to a large balcony with 2 seats and a table. Views were a little restricted. The other room had a window with views to the front but also a walkway in front of it. Each window had curtains and net curtains plus an electric metal blind (excellent to helping to keep the heat out when you’re not there. There was a large marble tiled bathroom with a good sized shower, large sink unit, plenty of clean towels and toiletries such as shower gel, hand soap and shampoo provided. There was also a spa bath, which would have been ok except there were no controls and no taps!! There was however a shower over it. You can, if you like, have the rooms cleaned every day.
The downside of the rooms. There were no chairs in the room and no mirror, so it was the bed or nothing. That was the same for both rooms. The bathroom, well apart from the useless bath, the shower would flood the bathroom every time it was used plus there was a very strong smell of drains all of the time. There is a safe and unlike most hotels which are 4 or 5 star (as the A G B states it is ) where the use of this facility is free , this is not free. So you will have to pay to keep your valuables safe. 
In the main part of the hotel itself there are some communal areas and an area with information from some of the travel companies. There’s a pool table and few games for kids maybe plus a few pricey game machines (there’s a claw machine, you know the ones where you grab a very cheap looking toy, don’t bother with this, we tried it out and I can tell you you don’t have a hope in hell of winning anything on this). If you want to weigh your luggage, there’s a set of scales in the lobby, but guess what, you’ll have to pay! The communal areas look tired and somewhat shabby plus they smell strongly of stale cigarettes. 
Let’s move onto dining. As most people go all inclusive breakfast is served from 7.30 till 10am, lunch from 12.30 to I think 2pm maybe 2.30 and dinner from 7.30 till 10pm. Between this snack and drinks are served.  Overall the 2 dining areas (in one is located the buffet) are kept clean and tables are cleared. There is air conditioning but a lot of people forget to close the doors after themselves. The food is always plentiful with a wide range available and choices of meat and fish every day. Hot and cold food is available. If you’re a vegetarian there’s plenty non offer, probably not so much for vegans but I’m sure they could get by adequately.
The food is well cooked and overall good to very good. As part of the anll inclusive, drinks are included. Spirits tend to be exceptionally weak, the beer is fine the ‘wine’ is watery. Outside there is a children’s play area and a small but very dated children’s splash pool. There is only one, fairly small and outdated main pool. There seem to be a reasonable amount of of sun beds and parasols, again a little tired looking. One cabana on the beach side was messily taped off and had scaffolding supports. Access to the ‘beach’ was also taped off and inaccessible from the hotel. It is possible to get onto the beach, however the beach is little more than a sliver. So nothing you can really spend the day on. The sea very gently shelves and is very shallow for quite a distance, so excellent for children. 
The situation of the Hotel in Alykanas is excellent and with an incredibly short walking distance of shops etc. 
We hired a car for our entire stay from a place in Alykanas, so didn’t spend an entire day at the hotel.
There is entertainment during some of the evenings and it’s again, OK, adequate, but nothing special.

Perfectly adequate

The Alykanas Beach Grand Hotel by Zante Plaza, is located right on the beach in Alikanas, and offers a perfect blend of relaxation and entertainment. This 4-star hotel features a restaurant, a seasonal outdoor swimming pool, a bar, and a shared lounge. Guests can enjoy complimentary WiFi, a beautiful garden, and a terrace. The property also offers a hot tub, evening entertainment, and a 24-hour front desk for convenience.

Each guestroom is equipped with air conditioning, a flat-screen TV with satellite channels, a fridge, a kettle, a bathtub, a hairdryer, and a desk. All rooms include a private bathroom, ensuring a comfortable and enjoyable stay for all guests.

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Alykanas Beach Grand Hotel by Zante Plaza